List of Jack LaLanne Quotes

The Tape Measure Doesn't Lie. Get That Tape Measure Out And Put It On Your Hips And Your Waist. Keep Checking It. And Keep Exercising And Cutting Those Calories Down Until That Tape Measure Gets Close To Where You Were In Your Prime.

If You Don't Like Corvettes, You Don't Like Sex And Money.

People Will Set A New Year's Resolution: "i'm Gonna Get In Shape This Year." But They Don't Set A Parameter For How They're Gonna Measure It. Or If They Do Measure It, They Wait Until The First Day Of The Next Year. You'd Never Run A Business That Way. Document Your Progress.

My Dad Was Overweight And Unhealthy, And He Died Young. I Wasn't Going To Let That Happen To Me.

The First Thing I Did When I Was Forty Years Old, I Put Handcuffs On And I Jumped Off Alcatraz Prison And Swam To San Francisco Handcuffed. That Made National Publicity. Then, There Were Three Or Four Years Where I Would Do More Difficult Feats. Another Birthday I Towed A Thousand Pound Boat Across The Golden Gate. On My 65th Birthday I Towed 65 Boats A Mile And A Half In Tokyo. On My 70th Birthday I Towed 70 Boats With 70 People In It With My Feet And Hands Tied A Mile And A Half In Long Beach.... My Next Birthday I Will Be 93. I'm Gonna Tow My Wife Across The Bathtub.

If Man Makes It, I Don't Eat It!

Focus On Your Problem Zones, Your Strength, Your Energy, Your Flexibility And All The Rest. Maybe Your Chest Is Flabby Or Your Hips Or Waist Need Toning. Also, You Should Change Your Program Every Thirty Days. That's The Key.

You Can't Get Rid Of It With Exercise Alone. You Can Do The Most Vigorous Exercise And Only Burn Up 300 Calories In An Hour. If You've Got Fat On Your Body, The Exercise Firms And Tones The Muscles. But When You Use That Tape Measure, What Makes It Bigger? It's The Fat!

You Can Take Them In A Wheelchair And Put Them In A Pool, So They Can Move Their Arms And Legs. In A Pool Disabled People Can Do Things That They Can't Normally Do Otherwise.

If It Tastes Good, Spit It Out. All Those Cakes And Pies And Candy And Ice Cream -- All That Terrible Fast Food Stuff! I Just Bought A New Corvette Sports Car ... Would I Put Oil In The Gas Tank? Would I?

George Burns Was More Athletic Than You Think He Was. And He Was A Very Social Man. He Loved People, He Enjoyed Life. He Worked At Living. Old George Was A Social Lion, He Got Around And Did Things. That's The Key Right There. It Starts With Your Brain.

Look At The Average American Diet: Ice Cream, Butter, Cheese, Whole Milk, All This Fat. People Don't Realize How Much Of This Stuff You Get By The End Of The Day. High Blood Pressure Is From All This High-fat Eating.

Who Puts The Food In Your Mouth? Who Goes To The Bathroom For Ya? You Do. You Came On This Earth Alone And You Are Going To Leave Alone. Think About It. If Anything Happens To Jack La Lanne Good Or Bad, I Made It Happen. If Anything Happens To You Good Or Bad, You Made It Happen - Right?

Another Intruder That Plagues Our Good Health Is Sleeplessness. Insomnia Is Much Like Constipation In That Stress Or Nervous Tension Can Bring It On Or Aggravate It Until There's Almost No Coping With It. That's Why You Find Sleeping Pills In So Many Medicine Cabinets Next To The Laxatives.

I Can't Afford To Die. It Would Wreck My Image.

I Was Going To Be A Singer. If I Hadn't Been In My Profession, I Was Going To Be An Opera Singer. That's From A Young Kid. I Had All These Records From All Those Famous Opera Singers. I Wanted To Be An Opera Singer - That Was My Whole Thing And Physical Fitness Got In The Way, Thank God.

I Have Spoken To A Whole Group Of Millionaires, Head Executives At Microsoft. Boy Did I Chew Those Guys Out.

If You Take Steroids, You Have To Pay The Price. They Can Kill You; There Are No Shortcuts. It's Like Going To Bed With A Rattlesnake, It's Got To Get You.

People Don't Realize How Much Of This Stuff You Get By The End Of The Day. High Blood Pressure Is From All This High-fat Eating. Do You Know How Many Calories Are In Butter And Cheese And Ice Cream? Would You Get Your Dog Up In The Morning For A Cup Of Coffee And A Donut? Probably Millions Of Americans Got Up This Morning With A Cup Of Coffee, A Cigarette And A Donut. No Wonder They Are Sick And Fouled Up.

What You Need To Do Is Get That Tape Measure Out, And Start Measuring That Gut. Then You Start Working Out And You Start Eating Properly Till That Gut Gets Down Close To It Was When You Were In Your 20's. Then You'll Find Out What Your Weight Should Be.

Jesus, When He Was On Earth, He Was Out There Helping People, Right? Why Did He Perform Those Miracles? To Call Attention To His Profession. Why Do You Think I Do These Incredible Feats? To Call Attention To My Profession!

My Wife Is My Protector. Without Her, I'm Nothing. She Wants To Please Me, And I Want To Please Her. We've Been Together Over 53 Years.

That's What I Wanted! I Wanted To Be An Athlete, I Wanted The Girls To Like Me, And I Wanted To Be Able To Get Good Grades In School, And This Man Said I Could Do All That.

People Feel So Guilty About Not Exercising. Especially People Over 50, Who Feel Like They've Gone A Lifetime Without Taking Care Of Themselves. Instead Of Aiming For Perfection, You Should Try To Celebrate The Progress You're Making.